Thursday, August 16, 2007

We get email!!!

The official BFB answer line ( finally got another email today! This one is from Samuel Kofi of Accra, Ghana. Mr. Kofi finds himself in a bit of a pickle and knew where to go for help. The Batter Fried Bacon Division of Helping People By Answering Their Emails That Usually Turn Out To Be Spam (the B.F.B.D.H.P.B.A.T.E.T.U.T.O.T.B.S. for short). Here is the letter, with my comments in bold:

Dear Friend:I got your contact during my search for a reliable,honest and a trust worthy person to entrust this huge transfer project with.My name is Mr.Samuel Kofi manager of the financial institution .I am a Ghanaian married with four kids. I am writing to solicit your assistance in the transfer of $4,550.000.00 million U.S dollars only,equivalent to 2.5 million pounds.

You have my attention, Mr. Koffi! Your decimal points confuse me, however! Does that mean you have $4,550.00 million US dollars or is it $4,550,000.00 million dollars? That would mean you have between $4,550,000,000.00 and $4,500,000,000,000.00 US dollars you have to transfer. Now, 4.5 billion dollars is a lot of money, but I'm hoping that extra decimal point was actually meant to be a comma and you have 4.5 trillion dollars to transfer. That's a lot of money! And it weighs 2.5 million pounds, evidently!

This fund is the excess of what my branch in which I am the manager made as profit during the 2005 financial year. I have already submitted annual report for that year to my head office here in Accra as I have watched with keen interest as they will never know of this excess.I have since, placed this amount of $4,550.000.00 million U.S dollars on an Escrow Coded account without a beneficiary (anonymous) to avoid trace.As an officer of the bank, I cannot be directly connected to this money thus I am impelled to request for your assistance to receive this money into your bank account on my behalf.

Wow, that's a big bank transfer! I don't know if my bank would let you transfer 4.5 trillion dollars into my account, but we can try! It's amazing that the bank you're an officer of makes that kind of a profit in one year, and even more amazing that they won't notice that the
money is gone! It's so unbelievable, it must be true!

I intend to part 30% of this fund to you while 70% shall be for me.I do need to stress that there are practically no risk involved in this.It's going to be a bank-to-bank transfer. All I need from you is to stand as the original depositor of this fund so that the fund can be transferred to your account.If you accept this offer,Please get back to me.But if you're not interested in this please do not reply.

OK! 30% of 4.5 trillion dollars is still $1.35 trillion! I could pay for another Iraq war with that kind of money! Look out Syria, here I come!And there is practically no risk involved! Mr. Kofi said so himself, and he's my friend, he wouldn't lie! I'm gonna be rich!


phishbone23 said...

You should go into a bank, open up an account, and tell the bank manager what you are doing and why. He would probably help you out big time....if you promise him some dough.

DrX said...

That would be pretty funny, actually.

DrX said...

Go check out, if you've never seen it. They follow through with these guys and get them to send them funny pictures of themselves.

phishbone23 said...

That site is great!!! If I had more time, I would string along some scammers for fun!