Thursday, August 27, 2009

Testicular pain

So, I got a vasectomy today. I can say this: it's not much fun. I should have known what I was in for when I asked the doctor, "So, afterward, what's the pain that I'll feel? Is it going to be the incision, or more like a ball kick?" He said, "If you don't move, you won't feel anything." The doctor is a goddamn liar, on top of avoiding the question. I feel like somebody sliced open my scrotom, squeezed my balls, cut some pieces out of there, cauterized what was left, and didn't sew it back up.

Oh, yeah. That's EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.

What is it about ball pain? Getting your testicles jostled is a different kind of pain than nearly anything else. Where's my vicodin?

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

The Jesus Fish Phenomenon

Why is it that every car that has the Jesus Fish on the back has to drive like a 90 year old woman? It doesn't matter who is in the car driving, the power of Jesus compels them to go 10mph under the speed limit. God is on your side, right? Don't worry about driving fast and reckless. Or, just get out of my way. Someone should do a study on this. The affects of the Jesus Fish on annoying driving. Get on that, science!

Monday, August 10, 2009

The Incredible Hulk fights a Grizzly Bear

Because this website is dead, but Hulk still smashes.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Long time no paint...


It's been a while! I finally picked up the paintbrush again on Monday:


Saturday, May 23, 2009

A new idea

Hi folks! I'm still alive! I have decided to raise BFB back from the grave for another crazy project. In the near future look for a Podcast from DrX, Fish and I. Here is the premise: We will invite crazy people onto the show and interview them. I'm not exactly sure how this is going to work in practice, but it should at least be fun to try.

So, you may be asking yourself, where are you going to find crazy people to interview? Worry not! The internet is full of them! I am beginning to scour the nets for the craziest conspiracy theorists, alternative medicine quacks, religious nutjobs, and all around douchebags and nutcases. If anyone would like to help, or has any great ideas, let me know!

For the near future, I'm afraid BFB will just mainly be a planning area for this project, so it may not be anymore exciting than it has been. Once we have a good plan, I may create a new webpage for it and let BFB die an inglorious death. If anyone would like to take it over, it's all yours! I just don't have the time anymore to make regular posts. But, for now, there should be at least a little action here. Wish us luck in our new endeavour

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Cautiously Optimistic

Ok, so they Yankees have now won 4 in a row and had a nice comeback against a struggling Angels team with a new closer. They are 13-10 and are 3.5 games ahead of Tampa, 1 game behind Boston & 2 behind Toronto (but they don't matter anyway).

So as a Yankee fan, I feel pretty good at this point. As the Kentucky Derby approaches later, I am thinking of horse racing and how it relates to the MLB season. Right now the Yankees are jockying in position trying to get to a good place at the quarter post. And I feel pretty good about it. We're staying right with the other teams, which after the last few seasons is a big improvement. We survived a big sprint by Boston (winning 11 in a row), a slow start by Texeira (BA: .189), but we're still right there.

At the same time, its kind of sad that a 13-10 start actually has me optimistic. I mean its really not that great of a record. Boston luckily, was 2-6 before their winning streak. Is this has really what it has come down to for a Yankee fan??? Mediocre? Really, Really???

Yes we are in the race and yes things look good even for a wildcard with a lot of good, but not great teams in the AL. But shouldn't we expect more? Not even just as Yankee fans, but as someone that can't even find a ticket for less than $150 available anywhere??? I mean apparently we should never lose because our payroll is so high. And it fucking better well be that way. If I can't afford to go to the game, they still have to look good on my HD.

Well that's my morning rant. Got a nice little Saturday planned. A lil' Kohl's, Fishkill Tire, maybe even a little kickball birthday celebration if we're feeling crazy. Oh and if you want to be my friend, sign-up for Facebook motherfuckers!!!

I'M OUT!!!
Mikey

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Unpopular Opinions

I am watching the NCAA selection show and I can't wait for the tournament to start! I am getting nervous already. Now for the unpopular opinions. First, I am SO excited Louisville got the #1 seed!!! GO CARDS!! It was interesting sitting in my living room last night watching the 'Cuse - Louisville game with Phishbone23. We had to sit on different couches. Second, now Phishbone23 just asked me who I would cheer for if Siena played Louisville. I have to admit that I would cheer for Louisville, if only because I hope they win everything. That being said, I hope Siena does well and if Siena beats Louisville, I wouldn't be devestated. And finally, third, I love Bobby Knight. They were discussing how mid majors tend to get screwed over if they are bubble teams (St. Mary's this year, and it may have happened to Siena if they hadn't won the MAAC) and Coach Knight comes in amidst all of the arguing and says, "Why not just play one more round". It makes perfect sense! It wouldn't be that hard. Anyways, I am looking forward to watching the games this weekend with Kev, MikeyO, and Phishbone23.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Caption This Picture




This is a picture from a race I did this weekend (I came in 2nd!). There is a perfectly logical explanation for the way I look, but it isn't really obvious from the picture.






Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Seed???

Well no one else seems to post on here, so I'll try to do it at least weekly. This weeks topic: Siena Basketball

So Siena made the NCAA tourney again this year, and its great. Looks like WE probably would have not gotten an at large bid, so its huge that we won the MAAC tournament. SO here's my questions: Is it better to get a 9 seed, have an easier first round matchup, and then play a #1 seed, or get an 11 seed, beat a 6 seed, and then play a 3 seed?

I think I'd much rather get teh 11 seed, since I think we can beat any 6 seed on a neutral court. Then smack around a 3 seed like like Bobby Brown on Whitney. Anyway that's my thought.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Warm weather, beer and basketball

So it is now officially two weeks before my vacation starts and I can not wait!!! Of course it starts on St. Patty's day with a 9:30 trip to the dentist followed by an 11:00 at the eye doctor. but after that, I am free to drink for 6 days in a row. the key this year is not puking 6 times on the flights back on Monday.

So it's about 10 degrees here tonight, super windy and we got snow. Houston sounds sooo good right now. Saturday I am heading to the Tu to watch the Saints begin their march to the Sweet 16. So Fish, what is there to do in Houston? Got any bars or places in mind to check out???

I know this isn't the most exciting post, but considering the posts we've had lately, I think this is a winner. Part of the reason may be that I gave on drinking on work nights for lent. Lucking I don't have to work when I am in Houston, so in the words of someone amazing "It's on like Donkey Kong". Peace out biiiiiiitchez

Friday, February 20, 2009

I am the Walrus

Ok, I know most people have heard about teh Chimp that went nuts and attacked and almos tkilled the lady this week. heck if it were me, I think I'd rather parish than live without my face and an arm. Anyway...

But a walrus is not a human. It has super tough think skin and thus not as easily damaged by a gorilla (even if it is bigger than a chimp). it also has tusks to help it defend itself.

Should there at least be some sort of post to discuss this. I see that the gorilla is a 6;1 favroite at this point, but I am not sure I agree.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Road Rash Brewing Company

My parents were in town this weekend. So in between going to Austin to get some yummy BBQ and spiking a golf ball (accidentally) off of Phishbone23's head while golfing, I used the extra man power to bottle my first batch of beer! Hopefully it will carbonate nicely in the bottles, but even if it doesn't it still will tast pretty good.

I know this because I tasted the little I pulled out of the carboy to use to test the specific gravity before bottling.



The bottling process was probably a bit more hectic than it could have been, but it all got bottled and is now sitting in nice dark boxes in the corner of my kitchen. Hopefully in a week or two I will have some nicely carbonated American Pale Ale to drink!







After bottling I deicded that since the carboy was now empty that meant I could use it for a second batch of beer. So now I have a cream ale that is sitting in my kitchen fermenting away! My hope is that both beers will be ready by the time Kev and Mikey get here in a month!


The next step is to decide if I want to keep bottling or if I want to invest in kegging equipment and a kegerator!

Sunday, February 15, 2009

I guess it's back on

The next battle of the beasts is between the gorilla and the walrus. Does any of the other posters here want to take this one? It doesn't matter how the battle is illustrated, just be original about it. Anyways, I'll post the poll on the main page for everyone to vote on the winner. It will expire on Friday night, so get your votes in, folks! Feel free to discuss your pick in the comments section.

Update: I forgot that we also were randomly picking locations for these battles, too. The problem is, I can't find those locations we picked for this. So, let's say this battle happens in a Burger King bathroom. 

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Zombie vs. Croc

It was a cool spring night. I caught the scent of fresh blood and my hunger made me pursue. I didn't like the fact that I had an overwhelming hunger for the flesh of the living, but it was all I could eat anymore. I've tried eating grains and fruits and vegetable, and even the processed meat of cattle and poultry, but none of them satisfied my hunger. I needed brains. Fresh brains.

So, here I was wondering through an African swampland, following the smell of life. Ever since my change, my sight has been poor and my hearing has nearly vanished. If it hadn't been I may have seen or heard the splashing as the giant reptile lunged from the tall grass to my right and latched onto my thigh. It twisted and pulled until my entire bottom torso ripped free. I felt nothing, as my nerves have long ago died and rotted. Here I now lie. A torso with no legs, a victim to the workers of nature, the beetles and flies who feast upon my dead flesh. Life enduring from living death. How ironic. Is ironic the right word here? How should I know? I'm a rotting zombie without any legs, and I have lost my battle to the crocodile...

No combo breaker today

Today I am finding out how many shots of vodka I can drink before I forget what day it is. It turns out I can drink a lot of vodka! Anyways, I'm feeling pretty happy right now. It's amazing how that works. You know, I've been thinking lately, I need some sunglasses. Now that I have contacts, I figure I can splurge on some non prescription sunglasses. Yeah, that really is all I have today. You know, I think I have to come up with another couple shticks or something for this blog. The battle of the beasts thing is just too damn time consuming. Sorry! I know it was fun and all, but it really is a pain in the ass to make those little flash movies, especially when the free trial for flash runs out after 30 days. Maybe I'll think of another way to simulate the fights that is a bit less work intensive in the future. Until then, you just have to deal with my rambling, useless posts. You'll take it and like it!

Friday, February 13, 2009

One of those days

I'm worn out tonight. It was one of those days I just didn't want to be at work, and the day just dragged on and everything broke. On a day like today, I like to punch children. I go down to the local elementary school and just go crazy, punching every little kid I can find. They all cry and ask "Why!? Why did you punch me?" and I say "Because I'm having a bad day, now shut up before I give you something to cry about!" Children love me!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

I'm posting today!

Hey Mr. Darwin, happy birthday! I did a bit of drinking after work today, but I got back in time to post before the day is out! Hmmmm... I, of course, have nothing to post about. So, let me just state in this post that I hate Eastern Europeans. That's right! I said it! You're all jerks. That's the sole thing I learned today, and I pass that knowledge on to all of my loyal readers. Also, pie is tasty.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Alright folks!

I have completely neglected the blog which is a horrible thing. It's not exactly like I have anything else going on, either. So, I'll tell you what, I'm going to make an attempt to make a post a day for an entire week, and hope that it gets me back in the mood. I guess that makes today the first day. I really don't have any clever ideas of what to post about, so let me tell you about my day. This morning I got up and drank a bottle liquid that I found outside on the side of the road last night. I have no idea what it was, but I just woke up! I have no idea what I did all day, but now I have only 8 fingers, and a tattoo of a Mexican dancing girl on my back! Crazy!

Monday, February 9, 2009

Beer Update

So I haven't been posting the day to day pictures because they all pretty much look the same. The foam has subsided and I am now just waiting for it to settle to the bottom before I double check the specific gravity (to make sure I am not going to be building little shrapnel grenades) and then bottle. I am sure that bottling will be an interesting process given the number of bottles and the size of my kitchen, so hopefully there will be good pictures soon.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

36 Hours of Fermentation


After 36 hours of fermentation (to 5:30am) I have seen increased CO2 output as well as a lightening of the color of the beer. The house has also acquired a mild overtone of fermenting beer.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Road Rash American Pale Ale

Phishbone23 and I brewed our first batch of beer yesterday using the equipment and American Pale Ale kit that he got me for Christmas. In order to prepare for this endeavour, I spent Saturday purchasing what I thought was all I would need to brew my first batch of beer. The beer kit has all of the ingredients needed for making the beer. They are all premeasured and the grain is even ready to go into the pot.





The equipment kit that Fish got me for Christmas has almost everything I needed in it for brewing, but I still had to get a pot (5 gal), a steel spoon, and I went ahead and got bottles for when I bottle it in about a week.

To get all of this equipment, I went to the store where Fish got the kits. The store, B&S Brewers Guild, is amazing. They have all kinds of grains and other stuff. They say they have enought variety to make 42,000,000 different kinds of beer. Using combinatorics I don't think that is really that difficult (especially since a slight change in amounts will brew a different beer) but still it is rather impressive. Even more cool though is that they do brewing demonstrations every Saturday. This is especially cool because, since they do brewing demonstrations every Saturday, that means they have lots of beer sitting around just waiting to be drunk. Since they don't have a liquor licence instead they have a freezer full of cold glasses and beer that they just give away! So I spent Saturday afternoon sipping on beer and learning about what I would be doing myself the next day.

Early Sunday afternoon Fish and I decided to start brewing the beer. This is when I realized I don't have a thermometer (not totally necessary, but being a scientist I like to be precise) so we ran back over to the beer store and got a thermometer. When we got home we started brewing the beer. Since it was Super Bowl Sunday I was also trying to multitask and make a cheese dip while my grains were steeping. Of course the ingredients and equiptment for brewing took up most of my counter space so I while I was making the dip, I accidently knocked my hydrometer on the ground where is promptly shattered. Luckily the beer store was still open. Fish, being the kind fiance that he is, ran back over and got me a new hydrometer.

This was only one of many mishaps I had while trying to brew the beer. The most painful of which consisted of trying to squeeze almost boiling water out of a cheesecloth bag with my bare hands. I think I can do better next time.

The most frustrating part of the whole process was getting the wort to cool. It took it over an hour to get down to below 90F. This is when I could siphon the wort into the carboy for fermentation and add the yeast.

As of 5:30am this morning the yeast seems to be doing its job and hopefully I will have good beer in a few weeks!

Some pictures from the brewing process are below! (I will try to add ones with Phishbone23 later, but his bright shiny face is just too brilliant for pictures, so they need to be doctored a bit.)

Steeping the grains










Boiling the wort














Cooling the wort












Just into the carboy with the yeast added


















12 hours later at 5:30am today








Sunday, February 1, 2009

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Suuuuuuuper Bowl!

Hey everyone. Long time, no see. The Super Bowl is coming up and I was wondering if you folks would like to try something like last year, where we had live updates on the blog. I figure I can post a chat box if people are going to be around. Whattaya think?

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Road Rash Pale Ale

No this is not a post about biking, but rather about another of my favorite things, beer. Phishbone23 purchased a home brewing kit (a real one, not a Mr. Beer) and the ingredients for an American Pale Ale for me for Christmas. I have not made it yet, but I think I will be trying to make it this weekend. Since there has been a lack of posts recently I thought maybe I would try to do a couple about how the beer is coming along. With luck it will be both ready and palatable by the time Kev and Mikey arrive in Houston in March.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Commence with the fighting

Can we please go back to the great battle of the animals that we had before. I think it was one of the mlost posted and visited postings we have had yet. So I say, "Commence with the fighting of the living, till only 1 creature is alive!!!"

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Broken teeth

Most of you have already seen this, but I figure I'll post it anyways. This is the painting I made for my sister for Christmas:

A couple notes

Holy crap! Snow! In North Carolina! We got almost half a foot of snow today and it's actually going to hang around through tomorrow, before it gets back in the 50s on Thursday. I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts!

Also, Barack Obama is not the 44th president, he is the 43rd. Grover Cleveland must not be counted twice! It makes no fucking sense! So, listen up media, Barack Obama is the 43rd person to become president of the United States, therefore he is the 43rd president. Thank you.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

A painting for Doug

Just finished my weekly Saturday painting, and I have to say, this is one of my favorites. This one is going to Doug. So, who do I owe paintings to? I know Mikey wanted one. Anyone else? I'm taking requests. Keep my Saturdays busy! It keeps my mind off of other, less productive, things.

Need a larger living room...


So I just upgraded my home theater setup and I wanted to share a picture of my old subwoofer (right) vs. my new one (left). It's a monster and I am very unsure where I will put it!! BTW, that is just a regular sized DVD case for scale purposes. Sorry about the poor picture quality.


Sunday, January 11, 2009

My inspiration for the last painting

This story from the BBC:

Juan the Andean spectacled bear first paddled across a moat using a log for a raft, then scaled a wall.

Finally he appeared to commandeer a bicycle, before zookeepers with brooms cornered him, and a colleague picked him off with a tranquiliser gun.


Bears on bicycles friggin rule.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Something y'all might ejoy

I found this while wasting time:

Latest Painting

Here's one of the paintings I promised to post. It sums up the last few months of my life:

Ok, I'm posting.

Sorry for the lack of posts since I got back from vacation. I am still alive, just distracted. I do actually have a lot to post, so look for it in the coming days. I'm just not in the mood right now. For those who were present at the eating challenges a couple weeks ago, feel free to sum them up. I can post the video later, but to tell you the truth, it's going to be tough to edit it and make it exciting. I'll have some paintings to show off too. One of which pretty much sums up my life right now. OK, to be continued later.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Friday, January 2, 2009

Left 4 Dead

Well, me and Kev got each other Left 4 Dead for Christmas. Killing hordes of zombies is really fun, and I don't sleep well after playing that game for a while. If anybody else wants to play, my Steam profile name is DrX, same as it is here.

Subscribe!!!!